On my mind

So ever since I found out that I was pregnant I have had this on my mind...


These are some ideas I really love, I also love the idea of having a "little man" party for a boy with bow ties & mustaches everywhere. 

Baseball shower = boy
Bunny shower = girl
Circus shower = boy
Giraffe shower = girl
I am absolutely terrified that my sweet little baby won't get a baby shower, since he or she is #2 I just have a this feeling that no one is going to worry about having a baby shower for him/her! It is very frustrating because I am not going to just straight up ask people are you going to throw ME a shower!! That is just tacky & rude... but I really am worried that no is going to think about it & that would break my heart. I also just really don't have many friends anymore. I have slowly been meeting more and more mom friends but I am not close enough to any of them yet to have them throw me a shower and all my good friends have kind of disappeared since I had Zane and even more so since I announced this pregnancy. I am not upset about it because we are totally in different places in our lives and I completely understand, we just don't have the same schedules and it is SOO hard for me to get out. I have to make plans way in advance and sometimes I have to cancel them because of having a toddler. I love all my friends dearly & it does hurt not to see them because I wish we were still as close as we used to be but I know it's not realistic! But back to the shower issue.

What this post is mainly about is asking for help... what should I do? Just not worry about it either way and be ok with the fact that this little love bug might not get a shower or do I say something? I am just really confused and I really need some help!

Libby Signature


Katie said...

Second babies don't get full blown showers around here. So it seems anyway. I have my mind fully set on the fact that this baby will absolutely NOT have a shower. Although, a small sprinkle would be nice--yes. The thing is, it won't happen. I know that. I think asking for one is totally tacky--but maybe a parent/grandparent could do it? I don't know. I just think the whole thing is faux pas to talk about unless it's someone elses idea, or else it seems gift-grabby. I know everyone has different opinions on this ;)

RichardLAnderson said...


Chelsea Thom said...

I think it's a little outside of the tradition to have a shower for a second baby. I'm not sure why though. Especially if it's of a different sex than the first, because then you have to buy ALL NEW stuff for them! Maybe you could talk to one of the Grandma's about this situation and they might be willing to throw one for you? Heck, I'd throw one for ya if I could! We should probably make a public service announcement that second/third/fourth/however many children should NOT get the shaft just because they weren't first. Their arrivals should be just as celebrated!

Nanette said...

I'll be candid and say that I side with "tradition" and am not a fan of showers past the first kiddo. While each life is worth celebrating, I think showers are designed to welcome the parents into parenthood, not a gift grab for each child. I purposely registered for gender-neutral big ticket items, so when we have our next eventual kid, we'll need very little. And the few things we will need, we'll happily buy ourselves. I've had friends who have thrown an open house type of party after the arrivals of their 2nd+ babies, but that's more of a "come meet our new addition" -- no registries created nor any gifts anticipated, nor any "theme." So, if I were you, I would not expect/anticipate/hope/plead for a shower. That being said, congrats on your new addition! It's an exciting time, and I wish you a very happy and healthy pregnancy!

MalloryMusing said...

I'm almost positive I am not getting a shower for the little girl in my belly. Don't get me wrong I would love one but like you I am in a friend transition period so I don't expect them to throw me a shower. I live 1500 miles from where I lived most of my life, none of my family or old friends are here, all my friends from college have moved away for jobs or grad school and I haven't worked anywhere but for my husband or as a nanny in over 5 years. I think as a blogger- we see a ton of other blogs where the person has a million girlfriends and they always throw these amazing showers. I just think it's important not to get hung up on that, yeah it would be great but it's just not my or your life right now. I wouldn't worry about it if I were you- try to down play it in your mind.

Amandajeanbuell said...

I think it is tradition to only have a big shower for the first born... A friend planned a small get together for our second, but no comparison to the first babies showers!

nicole said...

Such a hard place to be in. I, too became disconnected from so many of my friends when I got married and had a baby. Its like, hey hellllooooooo remember me? I still exist. Only better.... with cute kids.

Lame. It wasnt until I hit 30ish {cough cough I am 35 HOLY CRAP now} that I started to develop some great friendships with women who had children similar in age to mine {one or the other} and who understood what life was like with kids... husbands... and never ending laundry ;)

Its pretty natural lady. And, while it doesnt make it any easier... hang in there. Great friendships await, Im sure of it.

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