The last few days have been hard. I am hurting. I am done being pregnant... emotionally, physically, mentally, in all ways possible!! I have been having some major contractions lately and last week when I went to the doctor I was dilated to a 2.5cm & 50% effaced. So I could go into labor before my c-section date. I am also feeling sick constantly and there is not much food wise that sounds even remotely good to me. So I haven't been eating as much as I should, I do not remember this from being pregnant with Zane at all. So it is definitely something new. I also need sleep horribly bad! I barely sleep at night because I am in so much physical pain that I cannot get comfortable at all... so I just don't sleep. I am so tired that I don't have the energy to get up and clean my house or even do the laundry and I have not gotten her clothes washed yet. We have NO diapers for her at all. I mean none... there is just so much I need to do but I have absolutely no energy to get it done left. I know things can't be perfect but they need to be somewhat done.
Zane is also acting out a lot lately and I think it is because he knows there is a change coming and he doesn't understand what it is. I feel badly for him because I can't explain it any better than I have to him since he is only two. He just doesn't get it. I love him so much and I don't want him to think that he is any less loved than he was before just because we are having another baby. He is my life and I would do anything for him anytime. I just don't know how to make this better or easier on him. I am just so overwhelmed by everything that is happening.
Sorry for the totally lame & depressing post but I really just needed to get it out!